A place for moms to connect
Hi everyone, I am a foster mom and we have an 11-year-old girl, soon to be 12, living with us. What allowance is appropriate for a 12 year old? What should it include? What kind of chores do you all tie your kids' allowance to, and what if they don't do all their chores? Also, is anyone else on here a foster parent?
I don't believe in tying money to chores--chores are the activities that we as a family have to do to keep our home and family functioning. I did not give an allowance until my kids got into high school and even then they get $20 per two weeks (payday) schedule. We have a yearly budget for clothing so if you blow it all on one outfit don't expect any other things until next August period. IF you are smart and do the major sale shopping/thrift store then you can do quite well and might even have some leftover. But--my kids don't ask for iPhones, iPads,etc for presents either--they ask for books, fave writing items that are maybe a bit more expensive than what we get at back to school sales, special clothing items (dressy dresses) or Nook gift cards. I always include their school yearbook, 5 shirts and 4 special activities in their school budget for the year-they don't have to worry about paying for those things as they are included. All of their needs are met--their biggest wants are books and those I'm pretty happy to buy as a special thing. They do save most of their monthly allowance,pack their own lunches (even college girl does as it is much cheaper and tastes better) and they do plan out what they are doing.
I haven't started allowances yet. But my oldest is a second grader. At this point I'm just trying to teach them to clean and help with yard work without money as its their home too and they need to help. However, I get where you are coming from totally! The boyfriend's daughters are 11 and 13. Their own mother spent $400 on one pair of scissors and they get the most expensive clothes from the trendy's stores in the mall. I don't want them to be 18 year olds with no sense of money and go out in this world and rack up a bunch of debt. I agree children need to be taught fiscal responsibility from a young age and an allowance is a way to go about doing that. Last Christmas, I attempted a money lesson with the boyfriend's children. I gave them each $80 to spend with strict instructions to spend the money on their family and not themselves and that the lesson here was how to spend money wisely. I wanted them to use sale ads and coupons and find the item that they wanted to buy at the very best price and to show me how they could stretch those dollars. The youngest one did pretty good. The oldest one decided not to buy anything for her stepfather and pocketed the left over money I gave her. So I'm not repeating that this year.
My 7 year old wanted to attend the bookfair at her school. My ex sister in law works at a book store so we have massive amounts of books that we get on clearance and discounted. She has hundreds and hundreds of books that she hasn't even cracked the pages on. And I go to the 10 cent day on the Friends of Library booksale so I wasn't about to spend a money at that event just before Christmas. She had to spend her tooth fairy money from her piggy bank